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Watch the replays👇👇👇

 

Homework👇👇👇

  • Get clear on what you mean by wanting to feel more of his Masculine/ power? What would that ACTUALLY look like? Write down at least 5 specific examples. (eg. You want him to 'take the lead'. But actually describe what him 'taking the lead' would look like). 
  • "Can I have another go of that?" - Use this line whenever you've caught yourself criticising or really doing anything in your relationship that you'd prefer not to have. This is truly SUCH a game-changer. And to have the humility to actually use this line is EVERYTHING! 
  • Put down the 'tool' of CRITICISM. Remember: You can NEVER criticise your man into his POWER. And so, begin to practice putting down this tool. 
  • "Underneath every complaint or criticism is a DESIRE!" - Practice being a woman devoted to 'finding' the desire. And you can take it one step further & express your desire! 
  • Assume he wants to love you really, really, really well. Notice what shifts when you hold this assumption about him.
  • "Am I giving him good information on how to love me better?" - Remember he wants to love you really well & it's your job to make it easier to do this! It's your job to give him information that actually helps him love you really, really well.
  • Treat him like a POWERFUL MAN... NOW! - "If I truly believe my man was a powerful fucking man, how would I act right now?" - PRACTICE THIS! 
  • Acknowledge him - If you're currently in relationship, I want you to practice acknowledging him for things you've never acknowledged him for before our next call.
 

Homework👇👇👇

  • Two main ingredients to EVOKING your man's power...
    1) Offering him RESPECT  (this creates SAFETY for him to be able to BRING HIS POWER!)
    2) Expressing your desires (this creates CLARITY for him to be able to BRING HIS POWER!) 
    Let's dive into how you're going to practice both of this below. 
  • Offering him RESPECT 
    • Honouring his DIFFERENCES - 
      Remember your man is NOT a hairy woman. 
      He may not express (or do MANY things) in the way that you do. That doesn't make him wrong. That makes him a MAN! 
    • Before you 'railroad' him with all you want to share, ask 'permission'...
      "Hey my man, there's so much I want to share with you about my day. Are you open to listening right now?" 
      "My love. I have something on my heart right now. Would now be a good time for me to share?" 
    • Remember: A man is always looking for the 'point' or the 'problem' in a conversation. If there isn't any - let him know that. 
      "      Hey man. I've had such a big day. I'd love to just share what went down. All I need you to do is listen. Are you open to that?" 
      *This way his nervous system is put at ease knowing there isn't a necessarily a point or problem he needs to be looking out for. He's only job is to listen. 
    • Ask for his opinion/ leadership. And honour it! We spoke about stepping away from the energy of "I know better". If you deeply crave his leadership & direction in your relationship - it's time to practice giving him opportunities to lead/ share his opinion AND actually listening/ trusting it. 
      Eg 1. Him: "What should we have for dinner tonight?" 
      You: "I trust whatever you choose." 
      Eg 2. "Hey. It would feel so amazing for me if you decided what we were going to do for our date night next week." 
    • Let him make mistakes. And offer him GRACE & COMPASSION when he does. (a.k.a. Do not punish him or withhold your love from him when he does). This goes for both in & outside of your relationship. Your man will feel deeply respected when he feels safe to 'make mistakes' & learn from them (instead of being punished or told what to do). 
      Example: My Tomato Soup & Kayaking stories
    • Practice the art of REVEALING. You offer your man respect by allowing him to WITNESS you in what's truly ALIVE. Remember: He wants to love you really, really well. And it's respectful to offer him the best information you can in order to help him 'succeed' at this. This means no longer hiding how you feel or brushing things aside. But truly LETTING HIM IN. Revealing what's going on for you. 
      When you reveal you are focused on WHAT'S GOING ON IN YOUR BODY/ INTERNAL REALITY instead of focusing on what he's done. 
      Questions to ask yourself: 
      "What's alive for me right now?" 
      "What am I truly feeling in my body right now?" 
      And then your job is to REVEAL this to him. 
      BONUS POINTS if you then communicate the desire that might be underneath what you're feeling too. 
  • Express your desires 
    • This is your GREATEST TOOL to actually get what you want in your relationship. To actually feel FED & SATISFIED in your relationship.
    • Notice all the ways/ moments you DO NOT just simply ask for what you want. All the ways you avoid just simply asking your man for what it is you desire. 
    • Get clear on what WOULD feel really delicious for you in your relationship. From desiring him to cook dinner when you've had a big day. Or a desire to be whisked off on a surprise date. Write these down. And then practice asking for these. 
    • Some ways to express your desire powerfully...
      "Hey Babe. It would feel really amazing for me if..." 
      "I would really, really love it if..." 
      "Would you be open to... because that would feel so good for me!" 
    • Remember to keep looking for the DESIRES underneath your criticisms or complaints. Your job is to communicate this as quickly as you can in your relationship. NO this doesn't mean 'bypassing' your hurt or pain or dissapointment (aka. the art of revealing). This simply means instead of getting stuck in cycles of communicating what is NOT 'good enough' or what your man is NOT doing - instead you're devoted to offering him epic information on how he can love you better. 
 

The Questions:

  • [02:25] Q - Jacob, what was the main motivation to step away from the "nice guy" into the man you are today?

  •  [09:07] Q - How do I honour the 'not enough' wound in my man?

  •  [25:23] Q - Wanting to hold space for my man to step up but also feeling a level of scarcity. Meg, have you experienced moments like this? Jacob what did you think Meg did that was most helpful?

  •  [37:35] Q - My man gets defensive when I express my desires or reveal to him, what can I do?  & Q - How can I support my partner who is afraid of expressing without Mothering him? 

  •  [1:14:00] Q - How do I ask for what I want whilst dating without putting expectations on him? 

  • [1:20:00] Q - How do I let my partner know that I might leave without it feeling like an ultimatum? 

  • [1:36:00] Q - My man doesn't feel supported by I am offering him lots of support. How do I navigate this?

 

Homework 👇👇👇

  • Woman, YOU are a FELT EXPERIENCE. Don't just use your words. Let him FEEL YOU.  
  • Feminine Responsiveness - Your ability to allow him to witness you in what's ALIVE... IN THE MOMENT! 
    Whether it's appreciation & giddy-ness OR disappointment & hurt... your job is to practice letting him FEEL YOU... IN THE MOMENT! No more sweeping it under the rug & processing it/ silently resenting him for hours later. Time to practice RESPONDING in the moment. 
  • 🎉 BONUS PRACTICE - Playing in your Full Spectrum. 
    I've added this bonus practice so you can continue to stretch into the edges of your expression & embodiment.
    Do this AT LEAST once in the next week. 
    Download the practice here.
  • Bonus Video: 
    This is an epic video by John Wineland on Feminine Responsiveness. 
 

Notes & Homework 👇👇👇

  • Surrender is an ACTIVE choice AND practice. It’s an ACTIVE choice & practice to take ourselves from ‘holding’/ ‘gripping’/ ‘tightening’ into letting go. Trusting.
  • You aren't surrendering to Him. You're surrendering to Life. You're surrendering to MORE OF YOU! 
  • Practice honouring the 'time lag'. Not immediately jumping in & 'doing the thing' you've asked him to do. Or taking back the reigns on the thing you've offered over to him just because he isn't getting it perfect yet. 
  • The practice of SURRENDER requires you to BE WITH YOUR OWN DISCOMFORT. Next time you want to clean the kitchen after he's 'tried' to do it. Or tell him how to drive. Or squeeze his leg cause he's saying the 'wrong' thing. Practice being with the sensations in your body. Practice being with the DISCOMFORT that's arising for you. Often we try & control because we don't want to be with the discomfort. But being with these sensations is the ONLY way to be able to experience the DEEP SURRENDER your truly yearn for. 
  • 🎉 BIGGEST PIECE OF HOMEWORK: Do the embodiment practice at the end of this session. And then practice this exact work IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP. Practice taking yourself from contraction/ control into openness/ surrender. And practice it over & over. Again & again & again. 
 

THE QUESTIONS👇👇👇

  •  [2:01] Navigating low libido and mismatched sexual compatibility, how is it best to support him/us?

  •  [21:08] How do I support his premature ejaculation?

  •  [29:22] How to help a man feel connected to his body and what does that mean or feel like?

  •  [50:50] Any tips on sex life through motherhood and balancing that energy?

  •  [1:05:00] Is it ok to take the lead in areas he doesn't like or feels insecure about

  •  [1:14:00] How can men start navigating their self-discovery journey? 

  •  [1:23:00] Feeling lonely & unsupported whilst waiting for my future man to arrive? What should I do? 

  •  [1:26:00] How can I cope with my partners inconsistencies without resentment? 

  •  [1:30:00] How can I help my partner who hates his job? It has a big impact on our relationship?

  •  [1:38:00] I have expectations around my man proposes and I keep getting in the way of him proposing? What should I do?

  •  [1:51:00] Holding the vision and standards alive while in dating. Any advice?